Humility. How much do I have? I mean, when one says they are humble, that is a general sign that they aren't. So how can you tell when someone truly is?
The first time I fit this question in my head was when I was reading a book on the Virtues as taught by Jesus himself in a collection of "Holy Love" messages.
"Holy Love" is an apparition site in Elyria, Ohio. This apparition site is, I believe, as I have personally discerned, authentic. There have been so many small miracles that have taken place there and much personal peace found there that it is something I keep track of. Daily messages are given there by Jesus, Mary, and multiple saints and angels. These messages can be found at www.holylove.org/ along with many testimonies of healing, conversions and miracles. Please, I urge you, look at the content of this website and start on a journey of personal discernment. You can lose nothing by it besides time that you might otherwise spend watching TV or reading my blog. Ignoring possibilities like these is like ignoring a Praise and Worship night at Church because you're "just too busy" catching up on sleep. If Jesus really is appearing somewhere and giving us messages and lessons on present day events, shouldn't you know about it? If the answer of a little voice in your brain says "No..." then there is something wrong. Jesus gives us nothing that He doesn't want us to benefit from.
ANYWAY... So Humility... is powerful stuff. I used to think of it as a 'slippery little virtue', but now I know that was because of my pride. How can you have two totally contradictory characteristics in you without a battle for the control of your actions taking place moment by moment? (Did that make any sense?) The only reason I saw Humility as 'slippery' was because I couldn't have that and pride at the same time without giving over to the more persuasive one once in a while. Who wants Humility when you can have Dignity and Respect? Not to mention Justified Anger. The point is, you have to let go of all the reasons you want Pride to stick around. Dignity and Self Control aren't nearly as important as Heaven. Where will your Dignity and Self Control be when you stand before God the day you die?
Trusting in yourself is when you fall among your sins right when you thought things were going your way. Like getting caught in the brambles as you walk a thin and winding road. If you let Jesus guide you, you avoid the road and brambles altogether. Like riding on the mule that Jesus leads for you. You may object to where He leads you, but that's cause you're afraid He'll dump you at the next stop, or you might even go so far as to think He doesn't know where He's going. Stupidity itself, honestly. I think I'm more like the little runt that won't stop asking "Are we there yet?" over and over and over. As Christ's Bride, the Church, we have to follow Mary's example when she lets Joseph lead the mule (maybe it was a donkey) to their destination. (Joseph, what a wonderful and handsome adopted father. )
Humility... is letting yourself be lead, no matter how scared you are or how insecure. Humility... is knowing that trusting yourself is useless, because you don't know the way. Humility... is letting your burdens be taken away from view without objection or complaint. Humility... is letting yourself be cared for. Like the Apostles at the last supper. They weren't supposed to be selfish enough not to care who washed their feet, but Humble enough to let God clean them because He is there to serve His beloved. Don't our Elders have to humble themselves when the young wash and clothe them when they are no longer able to do so themselves? We are little, and frail. All Jesus wants to do is hold us and cherish us in His arms, never to come to harm. Humility... is letting yourself be loved.
